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Podcast Episode 31. “We all want friends, a misconception about people on the spectrum is that they don’t want friends”Jamie Wheeler tells us in this week’s podcast.  Jamie runs Austen’s Autistic Adventures, based in Richardson, Texas, a social group where people over the age of 18 can meet friends and engage in fun activities to develop their social skills.

Jamie explains that when her daughter graduated from High School, she lost her peer group as people moved on with the next stages of their lives. Where her daughter had once found comfort in the school choir and theatre groups, there was suddenly a void.

Determined to ensure that her daughter didn’t remain alone, she gave up her career as a college professor and launched a programme that was financially accessible to all and provided daily activities to allow members to experience real friendship relationships and reap the benefits of being part of a social group.

Jamie talks about the challenges of setting up the project and the ongoing battles she has with funding. She talks about the difference it’s made to young people’s lives and the future, as well as top tips for anyone who’s considering setting up something similar.The main struggle Jamie faced when setting up was not knowing where to find people. She faced this challenge head on by using social media, setting up a website and getting the programme out by word of mouth.

Jamie tips for setting up similar groups include
1. Stay community-based
2. Talk to small businesses
3. Have a great social media presence
4. Be truly dedicated to it – don’t be afraid to talk to others

Jamie believes that daily interaction with others, both on and off the spectrum, improves social functioning. This is the case at home and in the community. Furthermore, by going out every day, the community at large gets to know people with autism as individuals, which leads to more, and better, employment and volunteer opportunities.

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Podcast Episode 32. The best way to boost the self-esteem of our children is to let them have their say, give them a voice and help them to feel a sense of control, according to Soli Lazarus this week’s podcast guest.

Soli has a son with ADHD and so knows some of the struggles parents have first hand, as well as being a teacher for over 30 years. Her consultancy Yellow Sun delivers support and advice to parents of children with additional needs and challenging behaviour.

Soli believes one of the biggest issues for children with additional needs is suffering from low self-esteem due to society pressuring them from a young age to conform to the ‘norm’. Children may interrupt, be disorganised, be inattentive and so from an early age they are branded as naughty and constantly being told off. Consequently, their self-esteem plummets.

To help deal with this Soli talks about how important it is to provide our children with routine, whilst also giving them responsibilities so that they can be rewarded and praised. She discusses the importance of giving them the opportunity to make decisions when at home, because school can often be a very rigid place with little chance for make independent choices. By giving them the choice and the power, they feel listened to. Soli also addresses how this giving of more choice can impact on siblings and ways to deal with any feelings of jealousy they may have.

As an experienced teacher, Soli also talks about what she sees as an outdated education system focused on times tables when the focus should be on technology solutions which children with additional needs can access much easier. She explains how children with additional needs often feel happier online and this is a great way to counteract the difficulties surrounding making face-to-face social networks. Soli feels that using online tools can help to develop social skills and move them to a point where they can say they have real friends. Obviously, this all needs to be done in a safe environment and she reminds us that as parents we need to make sure we keep up to date as much as possible with the online world.

Soli talks also about frazzled parents and offers some suggestions to deal with those feelings of overwhelm. She talks about the importance of taking a moment out of every day to do something for yourself without feeling any guilt. She also talks about her own experiences of being lonely and feeling like she was the only one in her situation when her son was diagnosed. For her finding others who understood even a little of what she was going through was essential in helping her move forward.

The main idea from Soli is about sending messages to our children that help them build their self-esteem, develop their strengths and let them know that if they fail, that’s ok, it’s just a part of living their own lives.

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Podcast Episode 34. The term ‘letting go’ means different things to different people. Sometimes as parents we have to let go of our own expectations of what our children’s lives will look like.This was the case for this week’s guest Fiona who found that once she let go of her own expectations it opened up a new world of possibilities. Originally from the UK but now living in the US Fiona shares her story about why she believes letting go of expectations was the best solution for her family.

Fiona has two sons with autism and she starts by talking about the struggles to get a diagnosis for her oldest son, Hamish, so that he could get the support he needed. Part of the problem was that because her son was coping with the school work but not with the school environment the professional couldn’t really see a problem. However, once he was observed in school the issues were acknowledged although it did take another 18 months to get the actual diagnosis.

Fiona also talks about those early school years and about how engaging with other parents at her son’s school at least helped resolve some of the issues at school. She feels that by talking to other parents we can break down some of the assumptions being made about our children.

Once they moved to the US and Hamish was by this time older a different set of issues arose. One result of this was that Hamish was put onto medication which turned out to be a huge mistake. As time went on, Fiona realised that Hamish needed a change…they all did. So, when Hamish turned 16, Fiona and her husband decided that they weren’t going to force their child through the education system any longer. So, they pulled him out of school, and she believes that was the best decision they ever made. This took away the pressure of expectations on him and has enabled him to figure out what is the best way forward for him.

Fiona’s advice to other parents is to let go of expectations that you and everyone else around you might have about what they should be doing. The focus needs to be what is best for them as an individual. It is never going to be easy to suspend our expectations because we all want what is best for our children but sometimes we need to let them go find their own solutions.

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Podcast Episode 35. A social enterprise must first achieve success as an enterprise before they can deliver on any of their social objectives, that is the message from this week’s podcast guest David Hunter. David is the CEO of Acceptable Enterprises Ltd (AEL) who are based in Larne, Northern Ireland and provide employment opportunities for young people with additional needs.

AEL do this across a diverse range of industries from manafacturing bottled water to selling products online. The innovative array of industries in which AEL operate in has resulted in a very successful business in terms of both turnover and providing an increasing number of work opportunities for young people with additional needs.

One of the successful businesses is an ethical bottled water line called ‘Clearer Water,’ each bottle has a unique trace code that a consumer can type into an app on their phone. Doing this provides a stream of information such as the PH rating, mineral content and temperature of the product BUT it also delivers information about the person who bottled the water such as their hobbies, the music they like to listen to and what football team they support. Another business achieving success is the online business selling a variety of products on eBay and Amazon. The focus is on quality which as David explains is why AEL has extremely high levels of customer satisfaction on both eBay and Amazon.

David also discusses why companies need to understand that if they employ people with additional needs it doesn’t mean that the quality of their product or service will diminish as a result. As he says for many employers, the prospect of making reasonable adjustments when hiring employees with disabilities can be quite daunting. However, AEL has numerous proven ideas to illustrate to employers how simple reasonable adjustments can be.

AEL also believe in ensuring that all the businesses they operate have a diverse workforce, so they try to ensure that they follow a model where the workforce is made up of 1/3 people with additional needs, 1/3 people who have had challenges in their lives and 1/3 people from the local community. David argues that creating a workforce in this way reduces social isolation and is also more reflective of the wider world of work.

David also shares some words of advice for others who want to establish a similar company or organisation to help employ young people with additional needs. His advice is to look for a particular problem in your community that you want to tackle and then to use social enterprise as a means to combat that problem. Also look at the online sales world where you can reach millions of customers easily. The crucial part is coming up with the idea or concept for generating the income and using that income to deliver your social objectives.

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Podcast Episode 36. Planning ahead helps us reach our goals, and although we can’t prepare for everything, a plan gives us a general direction to travel and can even help us identify a final destination. In this week’s episode, we hear from Laura who has helped her son Jonathon plan ahead. This planning has enabled him to create a vision for his independent future, as well as prepare for the unexpected.

We start Laura’s story with Jonathan at primary school struggling to access education but finally, after a legal fight, he was placed in a school which could provide the support he needed. Jonathon is now 19 and just about to leave full-time education. Laura spoke about a variety of issues they have worked on related to independence including cooking, cleaning, shopping and learning to drive. Laura talks about enabling her son to be independent but in a very structured way.

One important part of Laura’s strategy was always planning ahead, particularly when it comes to thinking about work.  She suggests sitting down with your child and talking about what they want to do and to making a list. Don’t just leap into the dark, instead, take time and think about it, brainstorm and write it all down. Then, go through the list together and consider each option carefully. Once you’ve done this, you’re ready to plan with a purpose, and you can use the plan as the basis to start moving forward.

Planning five years ahead, or even ten, might sound difficult but working out where you want your young person to be in five/ten years’ time and how you’re going to help them get there is surely better than hoping it all works out in the end. As Laura says, “..never concentrate on the present, it’s the future you’ve got to always be thinking about.”

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Podcast Episode 37. The challenge of stepping back and letting our children take risks and make mistakes is never easy. How to deal with this challenge is the theme of this week’s podcast where I speak to Lisa Campbell, a Speech and Language Therapist, and Milla Johnson, an Occupational Therapist. Lisa and Milla discuss why parents/carers should try to step back more to enable their children to develop the skills they will need to live independently.

The main focus of our conversation is around how to develop the daily living skills needed to live independently. These include shopping, independent travel and money skills. Milla and Lisa offer practical ideas on how to develop these skills. For shopping that can include having a categorized shopping list and thinking about what time to go shopping.

When it comes to encouraging financial independence and learning how to manage money, Lisa and Milla talk about the technology which can help as well as how to make family activities, like going to the movies, opportunities to practice both money and social skills. They also discuss ways in which to develop cooking skills, including simplifying recipes into a few easy to follow steps.

However, they warn against using every opportunity you have as a learning opportunity, instead focus on a few areas at a time. Learning independent life skills needs to be fun for young people, or they will give up because it feels like a chore. Let them see the purpose of it and try to make it as natural as possible.

Milla and Lisa also talked about the importance of letting young people know that it’s okay to make mistakes and that they can actually learn from them. It’s vital that we take a step back and allow our children to make mistakes so that they can learn to safely problem solve and come up with solutions to fix the problem. It is this skill that they will most need if they are to be truly independent of us.

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Podcast Episode 38. Friendships and purpose are two of the most important things to have in our lives. For young people with additional needs finding these can sometimes be a challenge. In part 2 of Stepping back Milla Johnson, an Occupational Therapist, and Lisa Campbell, a Speech and Language Therapist, discuss how to manage friendships and access work opportunities.

When it comes to friendships Lisa and Milla recommend having conversations to help young people understand that friendship is a two-way street and teaching them how to identify the qualities of a good friendship.  They say that as a parent, you’re also their role model and so need to be demonstrating how friendships work.

They also suggest that one way to develop social skills needed for friendships is to help our children get involved in social-focused activities within the community. This can open the door of opportunity for them to make friends in a secure and safe environment with other young people. Another option is to use a buddy system where you link them with a young person who helps them develop their social skills.  Joining local sporting clubs can also provide an opportunity to interact with others. However, Lisa and Milla also note that not all young people will want to go out of their way to sign themselves up for activities like this, so it is often parents who will need to make the initial connections, then step away once these are established.

Another key part of friendships is the ability to engage in conversations. For some young people, conversation starters can be difficult and Lisa and Milla talk about simple strategies to develop conversations skills, even playing board games after having friends around for dinner can be used to help reduce the pressure of social situations. They also touch on the issue of managing social media and talk about how to use real-life examples to educate young people how to manage their social media presence.

Lisa and Milla also talked about some of the challenges around finding a job. They suggest starting with an honest conversation about realistic employment options. However, this is not about placing limit’s but rather looking at ways to link to each individual’s strengths and interests to job roles.

There are also some practical tactics to help make finding a job easier including maximizing work experience and volunteer opportunities. Milla and Lisa argue that when an employer sees a CV, they can make assumptions but once an individual has actually worked in the organization then they can be judged on performance which is way more powerful.

Milla and Lisa also advise parents that there will come a time when they will need to let their young person take the lead in the search for work because ultimately it is they who need to convince the employer they are capable of doing the job. By not stepping back parents can be actually be hindering their young person’s chances of finding employment.

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Podcast Episode 39. Work is central to most of our lives. It not only provides a purpose to our day but also makes us feel an integral part of the society we live in. In this week’s podcast we hear about the Project Search program, being run at the Marriott Hotel in Heathrow UK, which provides an innovative approach to help young people with additional needs find paid employment. The people responsible for running the program are Maxine Simpson, course tutor, Sue Stock, job coach and Saimmah Ali, job developer.

Maxine explains briefly the history of Project Search, which originated in the Cincinnati Children’s Hospital in 1996. She talks about how the program works and how the interns take part in lessons at the beginning of the workday on building teamwork and personal skills. This is then followed by their placement within a department at the hotel. At the end of the day, there is a debrief where interns have the chance to talk about their day and review any problems or issues they experienced.

Sue talks about how, along with Maxine and Sam, she is involved in the ongoing assessment of the intern’s performance. As the job coach, she provides feedback to help them to think about what their next steps should be and what type of job roles they might want to pursue. Sue explains how the interns work on rotation in different departments, which enables them to learn new skills, build a CV and identify what type of roles they like most.

Sam is a job developer, a role that involves networking with potential employers, based on what the interns have identified as industries they would like to potentially work in. Sam explains some of the challenges with this role in changing employer perceptions. She explains it takes time to break down the “fear factor” that a lot of employers have. One way to overcome this is with an unpaid trial to show an employer the abilities of a young person, instead of always having a formal interview process, which some young people struggle with.

Maxine, Sue and Sam discuss the types of challenges that young people face at the beginning of the program, transitioning from education to employment. It’s usually not the work skills that the young people struggle with, but rather their personal skills and learning how to behave maturely in the workplace. Maxine talks about the positive impact Project Search has had within the Marriott, where all staff have benefitted so much that Project Search programs are set to be rolled out across other Marriot hotels.

The success of Project Search is really down to a work based integrated supportive approach, which helps ensure that by the time a young person completes the program, they not only have a better idea about what they want to do, but they also have links with prospective employers. Project Search is providing a template for how to help young people with additional needs find paid employment that is right for them.

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Podcast Episode 40. Everyone needs a Shed – a place to go, to be. But this Shed is much more than that,it is a space for people with additional needs to build independence and work skills and engage with their local community.

On this week’s Podcast we hear from Clive Harris, the founder of The Shed. The Shed provides a community-based education and training service to help adults with additional needs develop their independent living skills. The Shed also offers a range of clubs and events for people to build social skills.

Clive explains how, when The Shed began, he wanted a location that was in the middle of the local community so it became entwined with the community. Thus, it would become part of a broader, educational environment where everybody in the community learns about the people they support, and the people they support learn about the community they live in.

One of the primary goals of The Shed is to help adults with additional needs find employment. The Shed has a shop selling upcycled furniture. The students run the shop, manage the finance and administration, deal with customers and attend auctions to choose the items they’ll work on for resale in the shop.

Another training program focuses on independent living. The Shed has its own purpose built living spaces, specially designed to support the development of essential life skills, such as preparing healthy meals, shopping and budgeting and safety and security.

For anyone wanting to start a similar enterprise within their local community, Clive offers some advice on who to speak to and the importance of getting the right advice if you want your program to succeed.

The Shed is changing people’s perceptions in a local community, and showing just what people with additional needs can do when they are given the right opportunities and the support.

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